It’s not about the money, money, money… IT IS!

I never felt poor. I mean, I have never felt that I would have problems with money. Never… until recently. Don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying I’m rich and all that. It’s more of like I could survive with what I have. Even though there are times that I myself have no money at all, my parents are there and they have the money. They’re my only source of money after all. So I don’t get worried even if my money is just one peso away from being zero. But recently, I felt that I should probably be saving more that how I usually save. It’s my first time feeling that my parents are having a hard time getting me the money I need. (Mind you, that is for my school fee, nothing extravagant.)

The thing is they told me to save. It’s the first time (I think. If there is before, then there isn’t much impact) they’ve told me to do so. I’m a thrifty person. Money is business for me. Even borrowing money is kind of difficult, awkward and… doesn’t feel right. I’m that kind of person. So saving is not a problem for me. And my parents already knew that. But this thing happened last Friday (Oct 18). I have to go school to get a good moral certificate and then to my dentist. Both need money. Usually, my mother gives me Php200 for my transportation fee when I’m going to school or to my dentist. And then, since I’m paying my dentist again, another Php500. But she gave me a little bit more. She said it’s my allowance and all that. That’s the time she added that I should save it, that my savings shall be used to pay those expenses. She did not directly say that “Our money is not flowing like water anymore”, but I felt it like a BANG! I felt as if all the money in my wallet is getting emptied. I felt as if everything in my room is sold one by one just to have money until I am the only one left in that room! And it hurts, you know! It’s my first time feeling as if my parents are reeeaaaallllyy getting problems getting money for my school fees. Of course, I know that even before there are times that money for my school fees is kind of a problem for my parents but I know that they have the money, they WILL have the money. But right now, I’m kind of nervous if I’ll get that money easily. Really nervous. I’ll get that money, somehow, but I feel that it will be difficult. They take importance in my studies so I know that they will make a way to get my school fees. But it’s a first that I have the intuition that they HAVE TO DO SOMETHING just to produce that money. :( Ugh~ I hate money problems. Stress. Stress. Stress. Stress. ~J̿L̿

(Late post.)


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