When we were kids, people always ask us what we would like to be when we grow up. When I was a kid, I always say I wanted to be a teacher. I don’t know or rather I can’t remember why I wanted that. All I know is that my dream when I was a kid is to be a teacher.
But no. Not anymore. That is a WAS. I think the first thing that made me change is the fact that there is no BS Education Major in Mathematics in the university I applied in. There is only Major in English. I don’t like Language, mind you, so I don’t like that. So I have to take up other course rather than what I wanted during that time. So why not change school and have that course? Because I am a scholar in that university. It has to be that school. No other schools. So at the end, I took up BS Psychology. It is quite nice. But I’m still not sure.
Another thing that made me change my mind is the low salary teachers get here in the Philippines. I know. True teachers aim to teach, not to earn. But I want to be realistic. My parents raised our family having the right amount of money. I never felt we had problems with money. I wanted my kids to feel like that too. So I want a job that will provide enough salary. And the teachers I had gave me an impression that they have low salary. Why not go to the private schools so that I’ll have bigger salary? You see. I visualize myself as the righteous teacher. I want to teach poor kids who were not able to get good education. Because I had one and I want them to have one too. So doing that, I won’t really get that high salary.
And the last thing, I suck at teaching. I think how to teach students will be taught during the course but I would always visualize myself as the not so good teacher. I teach kids at Sunday school and I suck at it, big time. I always try things out but, NAH~ I suck at it. Done.
So at the end, being a teacher is a no-no to me already. But since I was a child, I had that dream already. So now, I don’t know what I course I wanted already. I’m not sure with the course I took but there are times I really like it. But it is not the thing I’m really really really interested in. I don’t know. It is confusing.